Sloppy Drunken Bastard

Laugh or cry but seek cover (top-it-off and drain-it-down) if...

...total mass destruction occurs - *everything* gets trashed
...any major characters are killed
...a spell, prayer or fighting technique affects people not even in the area
...a preist(ess) commits an Evil Deed (TM)
...any of the Four Lords does a Good Deed (TM)
...anybody figures out the Rushe-DS connection without being told or shown
...DS transforms into Rushe or vice-versa without a kiss
...anyone tells a "When I Made Love to DS" story *anytime*
...someone successfully raises or defeats the demon "Anthrax"
...there's ever an unobstructed full-body shot of DS (nude, preferably, but if you find one like that, let me know...)
...anyone makes a disparaging comment about the gratuitous (partial) nudity - audience counts
...anybody admires DS for his wit and humor - audience participation definitely okay
...someone asks DS to do something and he does it without complaint or comment
...the Four Lords of Havoc are ever shown being warm and fuzzy (read: caring) in the present or past
...anybody mentions DS's love life either past or present
...Tia and DS have a Tender Moment (TM) that reminds you of Ranma & Akane (of "Ranma 1/2")
...DS disguises himself as anyone or anything else - becoming Rushe doesn't count as a disguise
...anybody mentions the ancient times during or before the Apocalypse
...anybody does a kick-ass diabolical or maniacal laugh (drink a little extra if it's DS)
...Tia, the Princess and Arshes Nei have an all-out, no-holds-barred fight to determine who gets DS
...Tia and Arshes Nei discuss DS's two-timing (and a little more if they do anything about it)
...anybody uses fourth-wall humor - acknowledging that this is a TV show
...the demon "Anthrax" is awakened and causes mass destruction and chaos once more
...the demon "Anthrax" is awakened and the scene is accompanied by a wicked-cool guitar piece
...the demon "Anthrax" is awakened and DS slaps him around some and forces him into hibernation once more
...DS says or does something cute or sensitive
...Rushe says or does something aggressive or forceful
...any audience member gets really into the show and says something like "Aw, isn't that cool/cute?" or "Oh, come on, I can't believe that!"

If you're still even remotely calm and sober at this point, then Congratulations! You have reached the ultimate level of Bastard!!-ization...

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