Socially Soused

...the name of an American/British Metal rock band is used as the name of a spell
...low-level destruction occurs - trees, bridges, walls
...random people or animals are killed
...a spell, prayer or fighting technique protects or injures people not at all involved in the duel/battle
...anybody sees or learns of a scene of mass destruction and says "That could only be the work of DS"
...someone expresses disbelief that DS might be alive
...DS's "immortality" is mentioned
...Rushe transforms into DS on-purpose after a kiss
...someone mentions the demon "Anthrax" (or "Anthrathrax" or "Antrax"...you get the idea)
...anyone refers to themselves in the third-person (like, "I, Arshes Nei will kill you...")
...a woman/girl shows open admiration for DS's body - ogling counts :)
...a man/boy shows open admiration for Tia's or Arshes Nei's body - fair's fair
...someone mentions the chaos caused by DS's army back in the day
...someone mentions the chaos caused by the Four Lords of Havoc and their armies in the present day
...either DS or any of the Four Lords boasts of their fighting prowess and backs it up
...anybody other than DS or the Four Lords boasts of their fighting prowess and fails utterly
...anyone mentions their dreams of the future in the middle of battle

Pleasantly Plastered

...the name of an American/British Metal rock band is used as the name of a country
...high-level destruction occurs - castles, forests...
...minor people or animals are killed or major characters are badly injured
...a major injury is healed completely in a matter of minutes
...a spell, prayer or fighting technique affects everything within the general area but no one gets hurt
...a preist(ess) uses a prayer or spell for any non-defensive purpose
...anybody mentions "Rushe Ren Ren"
...DS transforms into Rushe on-purpose after a kiss (give praise once more if it was a premature transformation ;)
...someone expresses disbelief that DS might have changed his ways
...anyone tells a "When I Met DS" story in the middle of a battle
...anyone tells a "When I Killed/Beat DS" story or does so in the present day - temporary death is okay
...someone actively tries to help or hurt the demon "Anthrax" (or "Anthrathrax" or "Antrax"...)
...any gratuitous shots of mostly naked people linger on-screen (i.e. "fan service")
...a man/boy shows open admiration for DS's body
...anybody admires DS for his practicality or intelligence or power (his skills/talents) - the audience counts, too
...someone asks DS to do something and he complains that he doesn't want to or doesn't have to
...the Four Lords of Havoc are ever shown communicating with each other about the war (any subset is okay)
...either DS or any of the Four Lords boasts of their fighting prowess and fails utterly
...anybody other than DS or the Four Lords boasts of their fighting prowess and backs it up
...anybody is confronted by blatant and obvious wierdshit (TM) and treats it nonchalantly or with contempt
...someone refers to DS by anything other than "Dark Schneider" ("Master"/"DS-sama" counts, as do "Rushe" and "Darshu")
...anybody mentions the *way* old days back before DS's army
...DS says something conceited or arrogant not related to his fighting abilities
...DS says or does something chauvinistic or lecherous
...any of the Four Lords claims to kill/destroy/conquer in the name of a post-war Utopia or Paradise
...Tia or any other priest acts warrior-like
...anybody goes through a quick-change of mood - for example getting mad or getting caring abruptly
...Rushe says or does something really cute and sweet - use your discretion and go wild

Sloppy Drunken Bastard

Laugh or cry but seek cover (top-it-off and drain-it-down) if...

...total mass destruction occurs - *everything* gets trashed
...any major characters are killed
...a spell, prayer or fighting technique affects people not even in the area
...a preist(ess) commits an Evil Deed (TM)
...any of the Four Lords does a Good Deed (TM)
...anybody figures out the Rushe-DS connection without being told or shown
...DS transforms into Rushe or vice-versa without a kiss
...anyone tells a "When I Made Love to DS" story *anytime*
...someone successfully raises or defeats the demon "Anthrax"
...there's ever an unobstructed full-body shot of DS (nude, preferably, but if you find one like that, let me know...)
...anyone makes a disparaging comment about the gratuitous (partial) nudity - audience counts
...anybody admires DS for his wit and humor - audience participation definitely okay
...someone asks DS to do something and he does it without complaint or comment
...the Four Lords of Havoc are ever shown being warm and fuzzy (read: caring) in the present or past
...anybody mentions DS's love life either past or present
...Tia and DS have a Tender Moment (TM) that reminds you of Ranma & Akane (of "Ranma 1/2")
...DS disguises himself as anyone or anything else - becoming Rushe doesn't count as a disguise
...anybody mentions the ancient times during or before the Apocalypse
...anybody does a kick-ass diabolical or maniacal laugh (drink a little extra if it's DS)
...Tia, the Princess and Arshes Nei have an all-out, no-holds-barred fight to determine who gets DS
...Tia and Arshes Nei discuss DS's two-timing (and a little more if they do anything about it)
...anybody uses fourth-wall humor - acknowledging that this is a TV show
...the demon "Anthrax" is awakened and causes mass destruction and chaos once more
...the demon "Anthrax" is awakened and the scene is accompanied by a wicked-cool guitar piece
...the demon "Anthrax" is awakened and DS slaps him around some and forces him into hibernation once more
...DS says or does something cute or sensitive
...Rushe says or does something aggressive or forceful
...any audience member gets really into the show and says something like "Aw, isn't that cool/cute?" or "Oh, come on, I can't believe that!"

If you're still even remotely calm and sober at this point, then Congratulations! You have reached the ultimate level of Bastard!!-ization...

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